Party at the Retirement Community

Labor Day Festivities

While most of you will be spending this weekend away or having parties with friends and neighbors in the pool celebrating the last unofficial day of summer, I'll be at my family's annual Labor Day barbeque at my Aunt's house.

If you think I'm attending a party where all will be meek and mild, think again.  Those retirees are wild and out of control.

Aside from the NY and NJ chapters of the Ashley Kink family, my aunt and uncle also invite their local cronies.  My uncle's poker pals, the local single gals from "The Club" and various and sundry neighbors all of whom drink, eat and gossip with abandon - every day, all day.

If you ever wondered why the people living in those retirement communities seem to end their Saturday evenings a few hours after the early bird special, it's because they've been partying since the wee hours of the morning while the rest of us are getting ready for work.  And I don't think they stop 'til they drop, literally.

No one in my family drinks much, yet each of us has a bottle to bring to the party as instructed by my aunt and uncle.  Why?  Because those retirees, who are probably on a fistful of meds already, love to drink and let loose.  They get loud and silly and flirt with each other and it's a crazy scene to watch and an even crazier scene to be a part of.

The last time I partied with the geriatric set, I went home holding my stomach.  It hurt so much from continually laughing so hard.  The 70-and-older set were lined up and leaning on my cousin's kitchen island and we drank 3/4 of a bottle of Johnnie Walker Blue - in successive shots.  Yes shots.  These people don't play around - they are serious about their partying.

You thought your party days were over after college or high school?  Personally, if I've got to get old, I want to get old enough to be so carefree as to show up at anyone's house armed with "party favors" and having my only worry be whether or not I should have brought the second bottle.  Of course I'll have to acquire a taste for daily partying, something I've never been able to handle, but think about it - you can hop in your golf cart and roll over to your neighbor's house and act a complete fool and the worse that will happen is people will say, "Aw ... she's cool; she knows how to party."  LOL

Well I guess I'm off to have some fun.  I'll be sure to fill you in on any dirty old men that happen to brush their hands across my ass or wiggle past me while I'm forced to lean my back against the counter with their faces in my tits - I speak only from experience; I kid you not.